Thursday, July 21, 2011

Lies We Tell Ourselves

Last night I was thinking about a story about a man that was on his way to hell.  I have thought about this story many times but never tried to find this story online.   I did a search on "Stories About Hell" and I ran across this website  End of the World 2012 

I clicked on the post "Will You Go to Hell for Telling a Lie"  this morning because it caught my eye because I realized just how much I lie to myself in doing so the lie I tell myself I tell others.  I think we are all guilty of lieing to ourselves.

Have you ever lied to yourself knowing the truth?  I have been lieing to myself about getting married to Ronnie.  I told him 10 years ago if we were not married after a year of being together I wouldn't waist my time with him.

Over the years we both made excuses for not getting married.  The first excuse was his mother.  She had Alzheimer's and diabetes so she was a full-time job.  We were constantly stressed out and no one else would watch her if me and Ronnie got married than went away for a few days.

The truth about this lie is we could have went to the court house.  I was content with not having a wedding.  I was also content with staying home.

After momma died the subject of marriage came up again.  This time Ronnie says he's worried about his credit because I have bad credit and his V.A. Social Security benefits.  He is afraid he will either get less benefits or lose his benefits if we got married.

My question would be why would any of that be effected just because we got married?  How would my credit effect his credit?  Why would he lose any of his V.A benefits?

I left him for another man and this man was ready to Mary me.  I was only gone for a month when this man asked me for my hand in marriage.  Ronnie caught wind of this man asking me to Mary him.

Ronnie went crazy knowing this will be it if I got married.  He called begged and pleaded.  He even said if marriage is what I wanted that is what I will get.

Ronnie convinced me he was going to make a proper women out of me.  When I came back we called around to find out how much it would be to get married.  It cost $88 in the state of Florida.

Next excuse we don't have the $88 this month we will get married next month.  As you already probably figured out we are still not married.

What is the biggest lie you tell yourself?